Clean Funny Jokes About Amuzement Park Rides

Taking the kids out

A husband and wife were discussing what to do with their two kids on the weekend. "They want to go to the zoo and the amusement park" said the wife.

"That's too expensive" said the husband. "It'll have to be one or the other."

"Well, which do you think?"

"Probably Mikey."

Three men shipwreck on an island known for cannibals.

As they wander the jungle they are captured by these cannibals and put in a cage. The biggest and ugliest cannibal approaches the cage and says
"Now we're fun loving cannibals and we like to play games. We'll give you a chance to escape for our amusement, with one item of your choice. If you get to the beach, then you'll be taken back to society. If you fail we shall kill you, skin you, eat you, and turn you into a canoe. Good luck."
The first man wants to go the traditional route and chooses a gun. As he runs to the beach, he runs out of ammo and the cannibals catch him, skin him, eat him, and turn him into a canoe.
The second man asks for a horse. They begrudgingly give him their only horse, and he rides towards the beach, but the cannibals spear him off the horse and skin him, eat him, and turn him into a canoe.
The third man asks for a fork. The cannibals give him a funny look and fetch him a fork. The man begins to stab himself all over. The cannibals ask him why he's making their job easier and he yells
"Try and make a canoe out of me now!"

Furniture shopping

An old favorite which might bear more than one telling is the one about the lady who visited a furniture store and ask to see a sexual couch.

The salesman, masking his amusement, politely asked, Don't you perhaps mean a section couch, madam?

No, no, she replied emphatically, I'm sure my interior decorator told me I should have a sexual couch for an occasional piece in the living room.

Did you hear the amusement park was offering free bungee jumping?

No strings attached!

Ukrainian authorities are planning to turn the Chernobyl exclusion zone into an amusement park

They say the only difference between it and Disneyland will be that the six foot tall mouse isn't a costume.

What did the Russian tell his nervous Socialist Dictator at the amusement park?

"Quit Stalin and get on the ride!"

I was at an amusement park with my friends.

They all said the invisible roller coaster was great, but I didn't see the attraction.

A russian joke: Some people in Mosow got stuck on a ride at an amusement park!

That entire country is got stuck on a ride! On something between a haunted mansion and a house of funny mirrors!

What did Adele say when she was at the amusement park?

Hello from the other ride

What's the difference between an amusement park and a pedophile?

A pedophile doesn't have a height limit

What did the broke zombie amusement park say to the wealthy vampire golf course?

I just need to get fundead.

You can explore amusement grad reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean amusement area dad jokes. There are also amusement puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

How to add extra fun during your amusement park ride ?

Carry some extra nuts and bolts with you.

as soon as the ride begins, Tap on the shoulder of the guy in front of you. Show them the nuts and bolts and ask

"Are these from your seat ? "

What does a ISIS amusement park have as a safety mechanism?

Allahu lap-bar.

At the amusement park's Haunted House, the toilets are three inches taller than normal.

They like to keep visitors on their toes.

One of my husband's duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to escort new recruits to the mess hall.

After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them

"There are three rules in this mess hall: Shut up!

Eat up!

Get up!"

Checking to see that he had everyone's attention, he asked, "What is the first rule?"

Much to the amusement of the other instructors, 60 privates yelled in unison, "Shut up, Drill Sergeant!"

What's the difference between tinder and amusement parks?

Amusement parks have realistic height requirements.

Did you know Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard?

Neither did she.

What do you call a bunch of dolls in line at an amusement park?

A Barbie-queue

What do ghosts ride at an amusement park?

A roller-ghoster

[OC] What's the most ironic amusement park ride?

The ferrous wheel.

The amusement park was taking photos of me on their rides without my consent

When i found out, i was fluming!

What's a jews least favorite amusement park ride?

The Holocoaster

I got ripped off at the amusement park.

A guy sold me tickets to the ferrous wheel.

Turns out it's made of aluminium.

Hear about the vampire who quit his job at the Amusement Park?

He used to set up the Hall of Mirrors but he just couldn't see himself doing it anymore.

A pegleg man is at the amusement park...

He is a foot short for every ride.

He leaves and goes to his favorite restaurant:

IHOP.

The feeling of amusement you get reading about "Florida Man"

schadenflorida

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the amusement amuse jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working amusement entertainment piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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Source: https://jokojokes.com/amusement-jokes.html